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My name is TenchiJK, I'm a asian/american guy who has alot of different shit to say about life. Nuff said lol

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Sunday, February 28, 2010

The black star(the escape)chapter 1-part 3

(previously on Black star!)The guard shouted “madam! I was order to get you to safety, I cannot let you leave this place! We must get to the safe grounds designated by your husband” She strained to get out of his hold, but soon gave up due to his empowering grip. “ I apologize madam, but we must get out” she pleaded with him to take only her son, and that hes make sure her son is safe. Ultimately the guard looked far behind her to see if anyone would see his subordination, and without looking at the mother he grabbed unto the child and ran straight into the shadows.(end)

The stale winds blasted upon the child's face as the guard rushed out towards the speck of light. The foot steps grew louder and louder as the light gradually got brighter. “we are almost there!” after what seemed like an eternity, the guardsman finally reach the outer walls. Their eyes coiled like the eyes of snakes, and when there vision came back into focus, they saw what was in front of them. The Guard quickly dropped the boy to his feet, and as he slowly backed off he pulled the knife out from his boots and handed it to La'sion. “use it on your self boy if it gets you... don't let it get you boy”
As he spoke those words , he used his shaking hands to slowly reach for his sword. He then gently circled around it, painfully creeping to take his sword out of his unresponsive hilt. Sweat dripped down his face like the waterfalls of Relan'je Creetlands, souring his vision with salt and water. In his mind he thought about his untimely death, and why he was in this predicament to begin with. He only joined the guard to support his family, his mother and two younger brothers. He has never been to war, nor seen a blood of another man. Fresh in his trade, and yet he wondered why he must die in this manner.
The creature slowly lurked towards them, half its body still in the ground. Its thousands legs waved upon the light in perfect sequence, as it made noises as if taking two organs and squeezing them together. It's hundreds eyes dawned upon La'sion , and la'sion stared back with its dark hazel eyes.

“Its a Morlak, my dad let me keep one , but we had to let it go because it got to big” The guardsman looked astonished with a hint of hope. “ you know what this creature is!?Please tell me this is that same creature” La'sion shrugged and replied “I don't think so...”
The creature seemed to not pass a certain boundary, and looked upon the two with curiosity more then with malice. La' sion slowly passed over the guards defending arms and went near the creature. “no wait, don't go!”
The Morlak raised its body up and bent its back as if it was going to strike. Then suddenly, the little boy with the dark brown hair ran towards the Morlak and jumped on it's back.He exclaimed with joy and said. “ its you! So this is where you were!” Then the Morlak stared into the eyes of La'sion and spoke into his mind. “ may I eat this man?will it bother you?”. To that La'sion replied, “ yes please, eat him”
The guardsman sighing with relief turned around to grab his fallen coat. He had regained his spirits, and had a renewed hope of survival. As he knelt down to grab the coat, the Morlak lunged towards him piercing his spine with its gruesome teeth. The Morlak's several breathing passage ways scrunched up, as the muscled jawline engorged twice its size. The guardsman's blood ruptured out of him and started to gush out black liquid like if it was Ink. Writhing in pain, the guardsman attempted to twist his body around to see the creature, only to see La'sion enjoying this appalling event. The second crushing bite left the guard immobilized and approaching death.
La' sion then climbed down the Morlak's many scales, and petted the carapace of the creature.
“ Boy, what … is the meaning... of this...” he spoke with grievance as blood spilled out of his mouth.
“I wanted to see your blood, This Morlak let me see your insides.”he replied indifferently.
La'sion then knelt down near his wounded gash and stuck his small hands to reach in for his liver. “AHHH!” screamed The guardsman in unbelievable pain. In his mind entered a thought. “ why am I not dying!? This is more then any man can bear!” As the little boy continued to invade his bodily organs, The Morlak behind them drooled, and impatiently squirmed to feast upon the body.
Dreadful moments later,La'sion pulled out his little hands out with a piece of liver and squeezed it between his tiny fingers and said to him.“ I hear you ,you know... Morlak is keeping you alive , so La'sion can play with you” The black in his eyes were no longer seen, only but an constant white tormenting his skull. In his mind he could not think of his mother or his brother, only the pure agony that came from this creature and the boy.

to be continued


  1. "previously on Black star!" Lol heard the announcer guy in my head like this was some sort of tv show.

    I would ask you to draw a Morlak but from your description I don't think I want to see it.

    Tenchi!! That is sooo disturbing!! lol ewww ugghhh I was holding my face in astonishment and alarm reading this last part.

    Hopefully it doesn't get too much more gruesome than this
    Keep writing.

  2. Wow that's amazing, but it seems like La'Sion is one troubled kid. You have an amazing way with words and literary devices :) its a good story so far, hopefully I can read more soon ^_^.

  3. holy corn beef hash.....
    This kid is like mentally tad bit "touched" man they must have treated him like crap as a youngin or was he born "Michael Meyerish" whoa creepy, but I want to keep reading. I certainly can't take the gore so take your time laying it out.

    Have you thought about writing a screenplay ? Since you already have the book it would just be a matter of writing it (which is totally easy).

    this would be a great movie

  4. Ok. I have to comment on this creepy piece of art. Were you traumatized as a young one? Did you watch too much Saw? Are you a big fan of drinking cats blood on Halloween? I'm officially creeped out. Where in the world did you come up with this? Sitting alone in your room, all the lights out except your night light.. and just decide to write about Creepy stuff..

    To my dearest Mel..I know you like Asians and all but I told you not to get attached to this rubbage.. Jeepers

  5. This is La'sion's background, he had a very wierd childhood.. thus being the villain of my story. It's only going to get worse from here on end for La'sion so, if you got a weak stomach ahaha, this is the time to stop reading.

  6. Dang this story is really gripping. I like the part when the little boy was reunited with his long lost pet,which was the creature. I never would of expected that.

    It was cool how they communicated telepathically. (They knew eachothers thoughts.)And it was kinda funny how la sion and the creature joined forces and turned against the guardsman, I would of liked to seen his face he was so shocked. And that was something how the Morlak kept the guardsman alive long enough for the boy to play with him. It was kinda sad yet funny.

    Keep up the good work Tenchi, you're really good.:)

  7. I agree with melonie. This would make an awesome movie. Although, I probably wouldn't be able to watch it with the gory bits haha. I can read it just fine though. I don't know why but gore doesn't bother me if I'm reading about it. You've got a really great story goin' on here. I can't wait to read more. :D

  8. well I am a writer as well and I see things when I read them (if you know what I mean) and dude reading about that Marlok thingy eating that guy with eyes and twitching ...ew just typing it gives the me crawlies creepers.

    Sorry I can watch people get blown up by a tank or head chopped of in battle and it not bother me but this